Fasten your seatbelts and hold on to your buttcheeks, folks. It's time for another edition of You Googled What? The monthly feature that sheds light on the sick, disturbing and downright baffling google searches that land people on my blog.
Does your UPS guy know you
If he does, he probably wants to kill you
Ecards – shove it up your ass
When Hallmark isn’t enough to say how you really feel, send an ecard.
hey mom someone from the gyna colleges office called
Well aren't you a clever little vagina.
i think i'm a hooker
Did you receive something in exchange for sexy time? Then you're a hooker. It's really quite simple.
ryan gosling pissing
Congratulations, you're officially a stalker. Also? Disgusting.
ryan gosling penis
honestly, people! He’s a person, you know. Not just a piece of man flesh.
It happens to the best of us.
“forgot how to walk” “my diaper” bottle
Ugh. Please tell me the adults with the Imma Baby, Wipe My Poopy Butt Fetish haven’t found my blog.
Brown cow goddess
Sarcasm. Cow. Same difference.
Marrying an Italian woman
All I can say is, good luck.
Shove it on your ass
When shoving it IN your ass just won't do.
How to have sex with the UPS guy
Invite him inside. Take your clothes off. You'll be surprised how easily the rest will follow.
The word penis
Is not as awesome as the word vagina.
"50 shades" redundant
Don’t even get me started
"massage my feet" brat humiliation
Uhh...I don't even want to know.