It's time for another edition of You Googled What?! Here's the latest and (not so) greatest searches that have landed people on my blog.
I hate when I'm studying and a velociraptor throws a bar
Ok, now you guys are just making shit up. When has a velociraptor ever thrown a bar? And while you're studying? Come on.
Peed pants: 4theluvofwriting.blogspot.com
The words "peed pants" were actually followed by my URL. On purpose. There was no accident here. Well, except for the peeing your pants part. You guys do know that it's an accident, right? It's not like I intentionally go around wetting myself.
Also? It's great to know I've become the authority on pants peeing.
Sarcastic cat pics
Those cats and their sarcasm...
Stop it. Just, stop it. You're being gross now.
I'm sorry for being a brat
This was much funnier the way I read it the first time: I'm sorry for being a bat.
Gangster Interior Design
I've heard those gangsters are known for their mad interior design skillz, but where is the proof?! Those gangsters are all talk.
What to write on love dice:
I'm not a love expert or anything but I'm pretty sure these are guaranteed to spice up your sexy time:
- Make me a sandwich
- Massage my feet
- Refill my wine
- You know what? Just leave me the bottle.
- No talking during dance moms
- Does this look infected?
The most embarrassing moment buying condoms
I'd actually love to hear this. Do share.
Boobies when your naked.
Honestly. Guess what, dude? YOU'RE not going to see my boobs cuz YOUR grammar sucks. I have standards, you know.
Excuses. Let's hear yours again
Yes, let's. And it better not involve a velociraptor. No one's buying that shit.
Mom blog anal bleaching
Oh please, no.
Normal looking vagina
I am so sick of society and its unrealistic standards of beauty! Just what exactly is normal, anyway? Hmmm? Short, fat, tall, skinny. They're all beautiful! Wait...I think that's people. All PEOPLE are beautiful. Vaginas? Well, vaginas are...er...um... I honestly don't have an opinion about this. Feel free to discuss amongst yourselves.
Satchel afraid of vacuum Get Fuzzy