Are you imagining?
Is your nose scrunched and your eyes squinted and your ears bleeding at the mere thought of the sound?
Now multiply the awfulness of that sound times a kajillion billion.
|Oh geez. We're going to be here awhile. Anyone got a calculator?|
|I know Harold. I know.|
Honestly, I should be brought in during the interrogation of war criminals. Three notes in and they'd be confessing to crimes they didn't even commit just to get me to shut up.
Needless to say, I don't karaoke. It seems unnecessary to subject innocent people to such heinous torture. However, one night after half a beer, I decided karaoke would be a fabulous idea.
The husband: Uhhhh, are you sure you wanna do that?
Me: Yes! I've been practicing.
The husband: Uhhhhh, what are you going to sing?
The husband: That is the worst idea ever.
Me: No really, I'm good. Oh! I have an idea. I'll practice right here for you first. Tell me what you think, ok?
The husband (to the waitress): What's the strongest shot you've got? Anything that can make me instantly black-out?
The waitress: Ummm, well we might have...
The husband: Never mind. Just bring me ALL THE ALCOHOL. STAT!
I cleared my throat, did a few warm up exercises and began to sing for the husband.
I can't say for sure, but I think the husband stabbing himself in the ear with a fork is a bad sign. So, sadly, I did not karaoke.
You may have noticed that it's nearly "L" day. I'm getting this post in under the wire so I'll double up on the comment gems are words and quotes of the day tomorrow.