Our topic this week comes from Ally of Two Normal Moms: 10 things you’d like to see happen before you die. She did give an alternative: "10 things that give you anxiety" but she figured we all didn’t have any little ocd habits like her, and she'd be left all by herself with a list of 20.
Silly Ally. Doesn't she know bloggers are neurotic by nature? We're also naughty by nature, but that's an entirely different list.
Because I am an overachiever, I shall do both lists.
10 Things That Give Me Anxiety
1. What doesn't give me anxiety?
Oh fine. I'll give you specifics.
1. Going to the beach (not being at the being, just the act of going to the beach).
2. My dogs. I wake no less than five times during the night and put a hand on them to see if they are still breathing.
3. Parking on the opposite side of the parking lot at the grocery store.
4. Arriving too early to a party.
5. Arriving too late to a party.
7. Wasting a cute outfit on an insignificant day. (Okay, that one's kind of a joke, but I can think of few things in life that are worse.)
8. Being in a crowded elevator.
9. Being in the car for long periods of time. Or short periods of time. Sometimes, I just need to GET OUT OF THE CAR RIGHT NOW!
10. Being in a crowded subway with 47 layers of clothing and OMG my scarf is itching me and I want to take it off but if I move my arm I will smack five people in the face and who the hell is sucking up all the oxygen? Why are we stopping in the tunnel! It's going to flood!! The walls are going to collapse!!!!! WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIIEEEEEE!!!!!
11. The movie Contagion. Within in ten minutes of watching my head started hurting, my face felt puffy and my throat started to close. True story.
12. People who...wait, I think I was supposed to stop at ten.
And now... 10 Things I'd Like to See Happen Before I Die
1. My book gets published. (And if it's not too much to ask...many of my books get published)
2. Make a living from writing.
3. We stop seeing gender, race, religion, weight, height, age, nationality, sexual orientation, political affiliation, disabilities, social class, wealth, superpowers, etc. and just see each other as people. Period.
4. An end to animal cruelty. Mainly because the thought of animals being hurt turns my stomach inside out. But also so the ASPCA, the World Wildlife Fund and Sarah McLachlan will stop running those horrible commercials. Seriously. Those things should begin with a warning.
WARNING: The following commercial makes 90% of viewers want to stab themselves in the eyes with pencils and then throw themselves in front of a train.
This actually happened to me, you guys. But instead of running over puppies, they ran over a cow. With a tractor. I already have enough horrible images running through my head at any given moment thanks to my brain; I do not need the t.v. adding any more. I CAN'T FREAKING HANDLE IT!
5. Visit the Inca Ruins of Peru
6. Swim with the dolphins. I've been wanting to this for twenty years which, of course, means my expectations for how awesome it will be are really, really, really high. And we all know what they say about high expectations. They make reality suck. I'm probably better off leaving this on my wish list.
7. Visit New Zealand. All of it.
8. Make a quilt. It's become this crazy new obsession of mine. Every day I scream at least three times, "I want to make a quilt!"
The husband: Do you want to meet me for lunch?
Me: I want to make a quilt!
Note to self: Learn to sew.
9. An end to depression, anxiety and other mental illnesses.
10. An end to all cancers.
And one more, because it's my blog and I wanna...
11. Wear a fabulous dress with some fabulous heels, gather all my real life friends and my bloggy/twitter friends at a fabulous location and party like it's 1999.