Guess what? I'm pregnant! Or maybe just tired. I mean seriously, there's no way my ever-expanding waistline is due to the fourteen pounds of cake I ate this weekend.
In all honesty, I've said I'm pregnant every day for the last six years. I'm pretty sure that makes me a polar bear.
Remember when I said tonight was going to be the Sarcasm Award show? Well sometimes I lie. It's the character flaw I'm most proud of.
Listen, I started writing the show but then I used up all my energy cheering on the husband cleaning up the kitchen while I laid on the couch and tweeted that I was cheering on the husband for cleaning up the kitchen while I laid on the couch. Exhausting stuff, right there.
Fortunately for you, I decided to write about why I write. Because I know you've been positively dying to know.
Because I get cranky if I don't.
To scratch the itch.
To still the voices in my head.
Because the characters demand it.
Because my mind commands it.
For my audience.
To find my place in this world.
To be remembered when I'm gone.
To calm the storm.
To ignite the fire.
To put my soul at ease.
Because it is the only thing I've ever wanted to do.
So I can be myself.
So I can be someone else.
The story I want to read.
To get away.
To capture the moment.
Because it is who I am.
So my lovelies, why do you write?