Monday, May 23, 2011

Remember When I Said The Husband Is A Wiener?

If the puzzle story wasn't enough to convince you, allow me to share another example of the husband's wiener-iffic ways.

A few nights ago the husband and I were having a conversation over dinner, the subject of which is not important.  We could have been contemplating the best methods to accomplish world peace, how much money we need to save in order to purchase our dream home, my insane obsession with plucking my eyebrows, or anything in-between - no matter how ludicrous or logical the conversation, nothing, nothing, warranted the following comment from the husband.

The husband:  You don't know what you're talking about.  You're on your period.

In case you didn't catch that, let me share it again.  The husband said to me: You don't know what you're talking about.  You're on your period.

Either the man is crazy or he enjoys the wrath of insanely hormonal women.

My response?  Just a look, a mixture of shock and you-will-pay.

The husband: What?

Me:...

The husband:  That is exactly the look I tell people you give me before I end up on your blog.

Me:...

The husband: I'm going to go now...

Later that night...

The husband: Tomorrow's going to be a big day.

Me:  Why?

The husband: I have a lot of stuff I need to get done.  It's going to be a big day for you too.

Me: Why?

The husband:  It's the third day of your period.

Me:  One, two...yeah you're totally right.

The husband:  You're going to write an entire blog about me and your period, aren't you?

Me:  I'd say the chances are more than good.

The last time the husband told me "tomorrow is going to be a big day" was the day before he proposed.  Almost six years into married life and a "big day" for me is being on my period.

Awesome.
************************************************
Dear the husband,
If you are upset by this post, don't worry.  No one will take me seriously.  I'm on my PERIOD.  I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

7 comments:

  1. I think I am more surprised that he is still alive after such comments than anything else.

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  2. I am so glad blogging did not exist back when I was married!

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  3. Ok so my eyes pretty much bugged out of my head when I read what he said. Oh hellllll no.
    Truthfully, when I'm in PMS I get so miserable even I don't want to be around me.
    Thanks for visiting fellow lady blogger and I totally appreciate the kind comment.
    p.s. love your blog name.

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  4. Yep, this time he is a weiner!!!! MEN--who knew they would be this much work!

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  5. I cannot decide if your husband is a brave man or a fool. Or perhaps he knows you very well? Funny story though! Thanks for the giggle.

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  6. OMG... thats all Ive got to say.. omg...
    clutching my heart...oye.. men.. when.will.they.learn.

    ha

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