Friday, April 29, 2011

He Appears to be Sugar and Spice, but He is Way More Naughty Than Nice

Some of the more popular posts on this oh-so-fab blog o' mine are the conversations between the husband and I.  Probably because people positively marvel at how someone as sane and sweet and patient as the husband could be married to a train-wreck like me.

You guys are probably all "oh, isn't the husband so sweet.  wow he's so nice to that psycho.  if I were married to her, I'd push her out the window.  Seriously he is soooo nice."

But...

DO NOT BE FOOLED!

The husband appears to be nice, but he's not. 

Exhibit A:

Last night the husband and I were doing a puzzle.  (SHHH!  Don't tell anyone or the boys at the sandbox will beat him up.)

While we puzzled, we talked, because duh.

Me (sharing my): hopes, dreams, goals, fears, insecurities, plans, ambitions

The husband: It is nothing but non-stop noise with you!

See what I'm talking about?  Soooo mean.  What a weiner.

That is how the conversation went in my head.  There is a very good possibility the conversation actually went something like this:

Me:  BEEP BEEP! EEE OOO!  EEE OOO!  AAAHHH!!  OHHH!! AWWW!!  RUNNING JUST AS FAST AS WE CAN!  HOLDING ON TO ONE ANOTHER'S HAND.  TRYING TO GET AWAY INTO THE NIGHT.  YEEAAA!!!  SIREN NOISE!  FOG HORN NOISE! ERRRRR! GRRRR!  OOOOHHH!  AND THEN YOU PUT YOUR ARMS AROUND ME AND WE TUMBLE TO THE GROUND AND THEN WE SAY!  AAAA!  FOUND A PIECE. YEEEEAAAAeeeeaaaEEEEAAA!!

The husband (with a look that I would imagine one would posses if one were having an ice pick drilled into his forehead, right between the eyes):  It's nothing but non-stop noise with you.

2 comments:

  1. Aaaack, I left you a very clever (if I may say so) comment, but some screen showed up, and it's gone!
    Ok, so I'll repeat myself: I do believe we share the same husband. But you can keep him. I quite like having the bed all to myself.
    ...it was funnier the first time I typed it.
    PS: I did love your witty comment at my blog this morning. YOu're charming (this part I don't mind repeating because you really made me smile!)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I get warm fuzzies in my heart reading about you two.
    "While we puzzled" = LOVE that line...Oh I could read your stuff all day long. More, More, MORE!!!

    ReplyDelete

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